I am sure you are all (by which I mean the handful of relations that will ever read this) wondering what in the blue blazes prompted this extraordinarily busy, workaholic mom to venture into the life of a blogger. Surely, I have better more important things to do. Surely, I have enough on my plate without writing a mildly amusing diary entry addressed to the masses on a regular basis. You might be thinking that I am completely insane for even attempting this, and you would be correct. I am insane; and I can’t help but notice that I have never taken it upon myself to have a creative outlet for this insanity. This blog is for me, not anyone else. I need to find a way to let out some frustrations and celebrate triumphs in a way that allows me to feel connected. I don’t intend for anyone to read this really. I will tell myself that people are coming in droves to see my mere 500 word entries in order to keep going; but the reality is that I just need to get it out. I need to be out of my head and onto a page so that I can keep my sanity, and the old pen and paper diary just isn’t cutting it for my addiction to the flair for the dramatic or my nearly-obsessive desire for attention.
What can we all expect from this blog? Well, who the hell knows? I sure don’t, and I am the one writing the damned thing. The direction I am going is toward is loosely modeled after this idea that a friend planted in my head about 5,000 times over the past several years. He has been strongly suggesting that I begin writing a one-woman-show, part dramatic; mostly stand-up, to recount the unbelievable unfortunate series of events that make up my life.
You see, there are many people in this world with bad luck, and many more with horrible timing, and probably several with a dry, self deprecating sense of humor… but none of them are my special variety of special. For example, I know there are probably an insurmountable number of latch key kids who became locked out in the early 2000’s. Of those kids, there had to be a huge number of them who had this happen in the harsh Canadian January. Of those, there were probably many who would have also been renting at the time. I would even go as far to say, that there are a more than a few handfuls who would have been renting a unit in old single family home that was divided into multiple units …. but I can guarantee that you will be hard pressed to find one other lucky soul who managed to fall into, and be completely submerged in, the septic tank on that particular day….. I’ll let that sink in for a minute, come back when you’re ready…. see what I mean? I’m a special kind of special.
So that’s my goal, to get this crazy life of mine out of my head and onto paper from my own unique (if not insane) perspective. Maybe it’s going no where. Maybe in 3 weeks I will have given up writing. Maybe I find it isn’t for me, but I have to try.
So if you want to come along with me on this crazy ride, buckle up and make sure the kids are asleep, because there is no holding us back now 😉
Thought for the day: “I wrote this entire thing and didn’t mention my age, my massive weight, that I have a four-year-old son, that I’m recently separated, or any other pertinent people detail…. but I did offer up my most embarrassing moment… what the heck does that say about me?????”